Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Lions Gonna Party Like It's 1999

     Welcome back to the playoffs Lions, it's been a while.  The win over the Chargers finally got you back in the post season!  It also most likely spelled the end for former Oregon QB Norv Turner as head coach of San Diego.  Celebrate responsibly Detroiters, don't burn down the town.

     Nick (un)Fairley is still listed as doubtful for the Lions.   Is he ever going to play?   My thought is he should give back some of the $9 million he made this year ($3.3 million base with a $5.7 signing bonus).   What's that Nick, you spent it, well just contact Cecil Newton.   I understand he is good at negotiating money matters.....

     Dallas defensive coach Rob Ryan stated that Calvin Johnson would only rank 3rd among receivers on the Cowboys, behind Miles Austin and Dez Bryant.   Let's take a look at the facts, shall we?   In receiving yardage, Dez Bryant ranks 16th and Miles Austin ranks 41st in the current Player Rankings by NFL.com.   Where does Megatron rank in the elite, oh that would be #1 with over 1400 yards.    In head to head competition, CJ had 8 receptions for 96 yards and 2 TD's.   Their top receiver in that game was Laurent Robinson who ranks 18th among wide outs.   Hmm, perhaps coach Ryan should thing before he speaks.   And, if this coaching gig doesn't work out for him he's a shoe in for Fabio's double.

Friday, December 23, 2011

C'mon, Really?

     I turned in late to the Las Vegas Bowl and what did I see?    On the first play I watched Boise State score and Arizona State flagged for a personal foul.   An Erikson-led team flagged for a personal foul?  Nah...

     The kicker for Va Tech was arrested for breaking and entering.   Well, at least he wasn't naked in a 3 point stance, right Beaver fans?  Makes me wonder WWLD (what would Lou do)?

      Best Buy has been airing anti-Santa advertisements during the holiday season, implying that they empower the purchasing public to be one up on Old Saint Nick.   Hmmm, way to endear yourself to the American viewer, by taking jabs at one of the most beloved icons of all time.  Great holiday tactic BB, making Santa sad...

     Nebraska center Mike Caputo originally arrested for suspicion of DUI had his charges reduced to reckless driving.   Caputo was found asleep at the wheel with the car running.   He recanted his original statement that he had just been out for a soda with Kiko Alonso (OK I made that up, but that there is funny).

      I just checked ESPN's website and clicked on the Pac-12 blog.   7 of the first 15 entries were about USC, none were about the Ducks.   Now this could be a good thing, nobody for the Ducks has been in trouble for a while, so the writers haven't had anti-Oregon material to work with.   But, on the other hand it proves my theory that writers still are in love with the Trojans.

     A local high school has informed its student body that the use of "bless you" after someone sneezes will no longer be tolerated!   Such a horrific statement could damage the forming psyche in these adolescents.  My suggestion is to say, "Sorry for your sudden, violent, spasmodic, audible expiration of breath through your nose and mouth and if you believe in a higher power may they bestow upon you a kindness".  Holy cow, oops, I better watch my mouth. 

     Stop me if you have heard this, a man walks into a Toys R Us, picks up a light saber and instantly becomes a Jedi.   If you haven't heard about this one, read about it here: Toys R Us Jedi
I wonder is he a member of this group?

     Schools in Florida have banned sagging, nice!!!   There are just some things I don't want to see.   Now how does that song go, "Pants on the ground, pants on the ground, lookin' like a ......"

     Finally, what are you doing wasting your time on this drivel, you should be making merry with you's and your's.  Once again, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year from all the Z's!

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

'Tis The Season

Ho, Ho, Ho!
    Well blog fans, the Christmas Season is upon us.   Yes, I said Christmas, not Winter Break, not Winter Holidays, but Christmas.  I am so tired of the attempts to be politically correct at this time of year I could barf.  It's Christmas and that is why we are taking time off from school and work.  So there!   Wow, I'm a little crazed.   I guess it's due to the insanity that we call driving at this time of year.   All the blue hairs and Mr. Magoos are out in farce, er force, to clog up the roadways. 

I keep telling myself that when I get to be that age, I will take public transportation or have my driver take me places (lottery willing).   I have concluded many things about unwritten motoring rules; 
1. tailgating is mandatory
2. the speed limit is just a suggestion (most are driving 10 - 15 mph slower)
3. turn signals are optional, (it is so much better to keep them guessing)
4. merging is more of a game of Frogger than a courtesy to merging vehicles

Sock It To Them?
     Yikes, Ohio State took some major hits from the NCAA - what you mean the NCAA is now showing some guts?   I guess Terrelle Pryor won't be getting an invite to the next awards banquet for The Ohio State.  Anybody still wondering how long it will take for them to strip Auburn of their title due to the Scam Newton situation?   I say 3 years....

     All kidding aside, for those of you who have taken time to read this amateurish attempt at journalism I wish you and yours a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Saturday, December 10, 2011

Rants & Raves

     As I read about the two Oregon basketballers that have quit and the track athlete that has decided to turn pro, I am reminded of how little the words commitment and loyalty actually mean in today's athletics.    One of the reasons I've pushed away from the pro leagues is the frequent jumping ship allowed by free agency.   Now fans face the same dilemma with college athletics.  Juniors allowed to enter the draft, changing schools due to lack of playing time, and just plain greed makes us wonder what is next for collegiate athletics. 

     In a way, I understand Ryan Katz jumping ship at OSU, he will be a senior and probably won't see playing time except to hold for kicks and occasional mop up duty.   The thing with Katz is he gave it his best shot for 3 years, long enough to know he did what he could.   He has one last season and wants to be on the field full time.  I get it for him. 

    Now the two FRESHMAN that have left the UO basketball program are a different story.   They faced adversity in some way and instead of meeting the challenge head on decided to turn and run - off to the next best thing.   All freshman face adversity - new faces, new places.   Heck, I spent most of my "extra" money on bus tickets home for the weekend while in my first year.  But, I soon became acclimated to my new surroundings as most college students do.   The attitude of "if Johnny don't play, Johnny don't stay" shows a lack of real character.   With that, the Ducks are probably better off with out these two malcontents.   But it still gripes me that that they couldn't follow through with their commitment to the university that was giving them a free education.  

    The track athlete may claim that the possibility of making as much as $700,000 didn't play into his decision to turn pro, but how can we not believe that was a joke he was making at the expense of his team.   The team that was counting on his points to help win meets.   But, an agent got in his ear and off he goes, leaving his team mates and coaches wondering who will make up for his lost points.  Surely a mega-star like Ashton Eaton had the same offers, but he stuck it out and finished his eligibility.  Maybe it's a character thing....

     Now on to the Cliff situtation.   Coach Kelly gave the kid every possible chance to redeem himself and he just wouldn't use his head and change.   So off he goes - hard to cut loose a consensus All-American, but the program has to eventually be bigger than one player.   As Mr. Spock said, "The needs of the many, outweigh the needs of the few,"-  nerdy Star Trek reference, sorry.    The comic Ron White has a great statement for this situation, "You can't fix stupid, there's not a pill you can take, there's not a class you can go to.  Stupid is forever."  

     Speaking of stupidity, my disdain for all things NBA festered when I read of Greg Oden's latest contract offer.   $8.9 million - are you kidding, there is a possibility he may not play at all this year.  This guy has played a total of 82 games in his career, appearing in a little less than 50% of the Blazer's schedule over that time span.  He averages 9.4 points per game, and they wasted a #1 draft on him!   Can anybody finally admit a "Sam Bowie" and move on?   No wonder the Blazers continue to be bottom dwellers in the NBA.   Their chances of winning an NBA title in my lifetime is about as good as me re-growing my hair.   Not gonna happen.

Monday, December 5, 2011

Pac 12 ChampionSlip

Sit down my readers and you will hear,
Of the Championship game in cold weather gear....

     Being in the right place at the right time, I scored 3 comp tickets to Friday's game at Autzen.  Excited, we gathered up our winter wear and headed off for a family outing.  The weather was great, cold and clear, bringing back memories of games in eastern Oregon. We took our seats in my favorite spot, high in the corners, section 16 to be exact.   To our left was the FOX TV booth with John Lynch and Marcus Allen seated, waiting for their cue.  Sounds great, right?

That's when the adventure, er, misadventure begins.    

     A few rows above us was a guy sporting an Oregon cowboy circa 1980 (I know because I still have mine).   Hat Man obviously had one too many and was letting everyone know how much (or little) he knew about football.  After spotting Marcus Allen, his endless rant became, "Hey Marcus, go Raiders, just win baby!"  OK, maybe he will calm down when the games starts.

The adventure continues...

     A man, one fan tall and two and a half fans wide settled down into the seat directly in front of me.  He was probably a nice guy, and maybe someone I would like to get to know, but when he sat down, he was in my lap!   I didn't need to know him that well.

More of the adventure.

     A family of fans, 2 adult children and their Dad,  entered the stadium directly behind us.  Obviously their volume control had frozen on high since everyone within 5 rows knew just how smart the grand kids are.   Having partaken of the grape a bit too much, most of their conversations had that wonderful slur and slobbery quality.

Is the game ever going to start?

     To say there was excitement in the air would be a lie, something was lacking, perhaps it was a quality opponent.   The Pac-12 did their best to cover up as much Duck as they could, but would have been better served making this game into a bigger event.  Conference officials decided to supply the game with another announcer to keep things neutral, but this guys voice would put you to sleep.   Don Essig is a great stadium announcer that keeps up with the play on the field and keeps the crowd excited.  I think this guy was back at the buffet during half the game.

     At half time I realized I had not fed my family and the growl I was hearing was not one of the crazed fans, but rather my wife and daughter.  With little in doubt as to the outcome of the game, I suggested we leave and get Chinese food.  I had it all on DVR and unless the world stopped turning, the Ducks were going to walk into the Rose Bowl.   Off we went for Mar Far chicken!

     I have come to realize that the best seat in the house is at my house.  As Dorothy says, "There's no place like home, there's no place like home........"

Sunday, November 27, 2011

Ho Hum

     The 115th Civil War, was it all it could be?  NO.   The Beavs showed no signs of being able to handle the Ducks and the game became a snooze early.   Senior tight end David Paulson put on a show with 8 catches for 105 yards, good way to punctuate Senior Day at Autzen.   Paulson is another great in a string of great tight ends for the Ducks and he should be a high rounder in the NFL draft.   Sorry to lose him, but Colt Lyerla seems ready to step in and become the next great at the H back.

No brainer, this weeks Winged Zed goes to 

David Paulson
Thanks for the past 4 years!

    Now on to the inaugural Pac-12 Championship, or as we might look at it, The Toilet Bowl.   Pac-12 South "champion" UCLA comes to town with a record of 6 - 6 overall.   Oregon is an early 30 point favorite.   This would worry me if the Ducks were playing somewhere else, but not with the game at Autzen.  As per my usual disdain for Tricky Rick, I hope we annihilate, obliterate, and desecrate the Bruins.  I want the 3rd team to score on his number 1's.   I want Neuweisel to leave Eugene with a sour taste for everything Duck.  Geez, I seem to want a lot....

Friday, November 25, 2011

Have you heard the one.....

     A Duck fan goes into an establishment and sits down.   He says to the large guy next to him, "Do you wanna hear a joke about the Beavers?"   The large man says, "Before you tell me I need to tell you I'm 6'4" and weigh 225 lbs. and I'm an OSU alum, the guy next to me is 6'3" and 240 lbs., also a Beav, and the guy next to him is 6'1", weighs 210 lbs., another member of the Orange and Black.   Now do you still want to tell me that joke?"  The Duck fan says,"No, I don't want to have to explain it 3 times."

Thanks to Son-In-Law of the Coach for this material.


Thursday, November 24, 2011


     Or should I say Suh-pidity?   Ndamukong Suh loses his cool and stomps on an opponent in front of millions on national TV.  His version says that he was just gaining his balance.   Did he see the replay - no, maybe time to take a look - he literally kicked a man while he was down.   Tossed out of the game, facing a fine and possible suspension, he vows not to change his game.  At the time the Lions were only down by 7, but his penalty gave Green Bay a first down and led to a TD.   Time for management and the coaches to have a heart to heart with Mr. Suh and tell him he will change his game.  Known as one of the dirtiest players in the NFL, Nd needs an attitude adjustment before he is completely out of hand.

     Now for stupidity on my part.   Last year Black Friday took me to a camp out at Target to reap the reward of a 40" TV for a ridiculously low price.   This year, stores announced sales at 12 a.m. Thursday.   I had a present picked out for my youngest and waited for the proper clicking moment on Best Buy.   We all (shoppers nation-wide) thought that the sale would begin at 12 midnight EST (9 p.m. PST).   Nope, I waited until 2:30 a.m. PST to make the coveted purchase, but no joy.    I went to bed, and of course shortly after that, the sale began.   Best Buy randomly chose when to commence their sale and guarded the "secret" starting time like it was a matter of national security.   AND, I was dumb enough to stay up until the wee hours to shop their site.   Not next year, I have learn my lesson.......I hope.

     Civil War on the way.   The Beaver Believers have reveled in the misery of Duck fans over the loss to USC.  They have totally overlooked the fact that they miraculously won a game.   C'mon country cousins worry about your own problems and stop tossing cow pies our way.    When pushed by the orange and black faithful, I am reminded of old Beaver jokes, like how do you keep a beaver out of your yard - put goal posts in it.   Rip 'em a new one boys.   GO DUCKS!!!

Sunday, November 20, 2011

Ducks Roasted

     Matt Barkley feasted on Duck Saturday, cooking them for 323 yards and 4 TD's.   Some may believe the game was lost as a last second field goal sailed wide.   Nope, the game was lost in the first quarter when the Duck offense failed to score.   The defense stopped USC on their first 3 possessions, long enough for Oregon to build it's usual lead, but LaMike and Company couldn't score in their first 5 series.  After that,  USC caught fire and it was all uphill for the Ducks.   After watching the opposing QB's the last two weeks, I rate Barkley ahead of Stanford's Luck.   Barkely was loud and clear on his "put up or shut up" moment, while Luck was relatively silent.

     Many of you are disappointed, but I view this loss as a mixed blessing, sure we lost, but now we don't have to hear all the "back to the championship" talk.  Maybe I am a army of one, but I really didn't believe Oregon belonged back in the big game this year.   Concentrating on winning the PAC-12 championship and playing in the Rose Bowl should have been the goal all along.   The Ducks need to win a big bowl to build momentum towards the national championship next year.   That's right, next year.   I believe we will have the pieces in place to make an earnest run in 2013. It all starts with the Civil War on Thanksgiving weekend.

     One bit of advice, if NBA players have been locked out of their own place, don't let them in ours.  Bad juju!

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

King of The QB's

     Aaron Rodgers is overwhelmingly the current king of NFL quarterbacks.  Announcers let you know on every offensive snap, and those who watch have to agree.   But, how did he get this way?    Was he thrown into the mix as a rookie tabbed the savior of a failing franchise?   Nope, he was able to watch and learn from the sidelines for 3 seasons before taking over as a starter.  
     Any NFL fan can think back to a top rounder coming into the league labeled the ONE.  You know, the ONE who lead the offense right to the Lombardi trophy.   But usually the case is the poor kid is thrown in behind a sub-par offensive line, is cursed with an lousy running game, and inherits receivers who couldn't catch a cold naked in a snow storm.   But because he gets paid a huge salary, his development usually consists of mini camps and pre-season camp.   Then, here you go rookie, save the day.   Uh huh, set up for failure.   It's hard to complete passes lying on your back.  After being pounded by defensive linemen, they usually find themselves as back ups on some other team and then retired to become color analysts.   For them NFL stands for Not For Long.   The silver lining, they generally retire with a vault full of money - and they deserve it.   Try standing in front of a 350 pound charging defensive linemen and then taking a shot from him.   Money well earned. 

     What has happened to my Lions??   Memo to Lion's management, while Carolina is in town this Sunday - get the deal done!!   Fairley for Jonathan Stewart and the Panthers 1st round pick in 2012.   The Panthers are too busy showcasing Scam Newton to use Stewart to his full potential.   Additionally, Carolina would love to get another over-rated player to go along with Scam.  

Sunday, November 13, 2011

Tree Trimmed

  Dismantled.  That's how I would describe what Oregon did to Stanford.   The coaches concocted a near perfect game plan to take down Stanford, and the team executed it at an unbelievable level.  Sprinkle in a new extra point and you have a such an entertaining game that I'm on my 3rd viewing.  

   Improvement over the course of a season is what all programs strive for.   Oregon has definitely accomplished this since the LSU game.  The greatest improvement has been with the defensive line.  The Washington game showed what the D line could do and the Stanford game showed what they will do.  Coach Jerry Azzinaro has made this unit into a defensive force that should make the final two games very interesting for their opponents. 

The Winged Zed for UW game and the Stanford game goes to
 Coach Jerry Azzinaro and his D Linemen

Next up, the Ohio State of the West, USC.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Money, Money, Money

Pay for Play

     The NCAA is contemplating a policy where they would pay athletes $2000 a year for incidentals.   Citing the need for cash to pay for laundry, incidentals, traffic tickets... 

     Hmmm, something to think about.  On one hand they do bring in a boatload of cash to the universities - on the other hand they do receive tuition, books, room, and board.    Where will this additional money come from?   Whenever a financial decision like this one is made, somebody loses.  A personal anecdote, when Title IX was instituted, Oregon's athletic department had to come up with additional funds to shift to women's athletics.  One small way was to drop the partial tuition scholarship I was receiving as an athletic trainer.   Decisions to fund have an effect that is not always seen by the public, but is felt by the little guy, or usually someone not in the mainstream public eye.  U of O athletes receive the equivalent of approximately $20,000 per year in assistance.   Many working stiffs don't bring home that much.   My opinion - this is more than enough.  If they need an allowance, they can ask their folks.

Pay the Piper, er.. Piper to Pay?

    Prior to this year, the U of O has allowed guest groups to perform at halfttime at basketball games.  Following their performance, they were allowed to watch the game if it was not sold out.  This year, they will charge performers $12 for men's games and $3 for women's.  Wow, is the University so strapped for cash that they need to charge groups to provide them with entertainment?   Seems backwards, doesn't it?   Oh now I get it, this will help to pay the athletes their $2000...   
     I have heard there is a movement to change our mascot from the familiar Donald image to that of Scrooge McDuck to keep with the athletic department's recent outlook.

Sunday, October 30, 2011

Yep, I Called It

                                                    We do have a QB controversy!
      Bryan Bennett put a charge in a sluggish offense when he entered the game at the half on Saturday.   The Cougar defense had to honor his ability to carry the ball and not just key on the running back.   Recently, when Thomas runs the "option" he looks to give to the running back over 90% of the time (unofficial statistic).   Bennett has more of a 60% "give" ratio, making it a true option.    Now, I know that Thomas is still a little gimpy, which makes his running the ball a bit of a gamble, but it limits our offense too much.   Or, is Bennett just better at the option?   Anyway, big props to Daddy Duck, Chip Kelly, for making the change at halftime.  Keep your "options" open...

     Holy Crikees, are our wide receivers ever going to catch the first ball thrown to them?   Sometimes they look like they have the hands of a small dog.   Perhaps their concentration on blocking (and they block better than any other corps of receiver in the nation) needs to carry over to concentrating on catching the ball. 

     After a win like that I don't have a truly deserving Duck candidate to bestow a Winged Zed - if I did it would be another one to Bryan Bennett.  
     This weeks honors goes to an NFL'er!   Former Ontario H.S. Tiger and Oregon Duck, A.J. Feeley wins this prestigious award for quaterbacking the St. Louis Rams to their first win of the season.
Congrats big guy and, if you're smart, keep handing the ball off to 
Steven Jackson!